Ammachi, a memory

A memory called Ammachi is a short story originally written in Kannada by Vasanti whose is very popular in the literary circle by her pen name Vaidehi. The base for the story is the real life incidents happened with the author who is also part of the story. Vaidehi recalls her memory and remembers the time she spent with Ammachi, whom she remembers for being bold, expressive and one who was challenging the traditional norms which were not allowing her to be herself. The author came into contact of Ammachi at very early age. At this time the community saw Ammachi as a disobedient, disrespectful for the elders, immodest girl and thought if their children come in the company of Ammachi it’s all over. The author was very young and from a well-educated and affluent family. The family members of the author  never stopped her to go to Ammachi’s house neither be in her company. Even Ammachi did not have friends of her age. All these became the causes for their friendship. The author was fascinated by the personality of Ammachi, which gave her a different perception of women which at that time very hard to imagine in a village setting.

The author narrates that Ammachi was the only child of Seetatte and at her very young age lost her father and there was no male member in the family. It was Venkappayya who was himself six years entered the house to help her family later became the dominant male member. It is evident from the incidents happen and the voice of the author and the mother of Ammachi again and again mentioning about the importance of the help from venkappayya saving their family,  that how difficult for a woman to live or look after the family if there were no male members in the family.  Ammachi never liked Venkappayya and had a special liking for Shyambhatt’s house whose son was studying in the city. She was visiting Shymbhatt’s house often though there was strong discontent from Venkappayya who was intending to marry Ammachi and she never liked and hated him a lot. The author recalls in the story how amused it was to listen to Ammachi in commenting about Venkappayya, as squint eyed, bullock is better than him or calling him as bald head. The laughter of the author stimulated her to go on commenting. The author also remembers that Ammachi was a great beauty conscious, whenever she was going out for market or elsewhere. The author narrates with many examples of it when she uses the Himalayan powder, carefully adjusting her pallu or looking into the small mirror many times. The way author mentioned these incidents shows that Ammachi still kept the belief of that time for a woman’s being. The author shared intimate relation with Ammachi and narrates that her company made her feel good and she would not have been anywhere if the author was not there with her. The author greatly amused about the sense of humour and time senses in replying to the uncomfortable questions posed to Ammachi, may it be calling Venkappayya as Kunkappayya or giving reply to the tailor to stich the back button blouse or telling Venkappayya that she was going to Tokara Gudde to buy poison. It was not possible to anyone to talk anything against her as she had a ready wit to offer to them.  

There is another incident that the author recalls from her memory when they go to Rama teacher who is also a tailor. She asks her to stich a back button blouse for her for which the teacher laughs sarcastically. She finds it offensive there is a concern which the author expresses that if the people from a certain caste and class are willing to follow a popular culture it was seemed as if it was only meant to certain class if the same thing was done by somebody they were mocked. This issue we discussed and I too felt the same way that the author felt. It has become a fashion for some people to wear torn clothes or tear the proper clothes and wear and for some it is misfortune to wear and seemed like they are mocking at the people those do not have the clothes to wear. The gender and marriages were other issues came up in our discussion. Venkappayya even not married and started dominating Ammachi like anything even gone up to assaulting her physically. We came up with the conclusion that as soon as people married the husband gets the licence over her husband and the wife has to serve and listened to him for all of his life missing of which may result in the physical assault of the wife. In the story also there are many incidents where Venkappayya exercises his power over Ammachi on many issues for which she even not married to him had to listened to him because of her mother and other social restrictions which could have labelled her something else. The main discussion was around the gender bias, Ammachi though being bold enough to go against the social restriction could not get away with marrying Venkappayya. The end of the story where Ammachi loses her husband seemed like there was no end for the apathy of her which she had been suffering from her birth and it was not the end of the story but the start of her story of plight again….